"You're my kind of bride"

I knew I'd found the right florist, when Silke of Local Flora, said that to me.

Before we even got down to the details of arrangements and colors, we had a long talk about sustainability, and pesticides, and local growers, and why it's so hard to find organic flowers. (Answer: consumers demand perfect petals, and growers have difficulty making ends meet if they have to throw away too many munched blooms.) Silke said that the market for organic flowers is in its infancy, in the same way that the market for organic food was ten years ago. Many people don't realize the amounts of pesticides used on flowers or the concomitant dangers (a topic I wrote about here), and don't think to request organic flowers. She and her shop are working to nurture the local supply of organic flowers by working with individual growers, and buying extra blooms from individuals with extensive organic gardens.

Her gorgeous designs show that you don't have to give up elegance by going local and organic.

I showed Silke my favorite flower inspiration image (via SMP), and then said, "But no roses." She didn't bat an eye.
She grabbed some sunflowers - organic ones are easily available - along with some coxcomb and dark red dahlias, and started putting together a bouquet full of bright colors and interesting textures as I watched.

Now the only question is how many corsages and boutonnieres to order for our non-traditional band of wedding helpers.

Wedding trend: camping out

here, via FFFFOUND!

Is it just me and my low-impact, recycling-happy, granola-eating, mate-sipping friends, or is camping out for a wedding the new trend?

I've just returned from the third of five weddings this season (the final one being OURS!). We were encouraged to camp at two of the weddings, easily could've camped for the third and fourth, and are offering camping as an option for the fifth (ours).

I love getting outdoors, and camping and hiking have always been some of my preferred forms of recreation.... but I also think there's something slightly incongruous about camping out at a wedding.

On the plus side, camping is cheap and social and convenient. The most expensive campsite is a third or less the cost of a hotel room - an ever important consideration for a bunch of impoverished grad students. And this past weekend, the camping was free on Dr. Cowgirl's parents' land (no price is better than that!). With four weddings to travel to this summer, along with our own to plan, it would have been tough financially if we had not had low-cost accommodations options for some of them.

Camping is social: it's been great to hang out with the others in attendance without running from hotel to hotel. Sitting around late night campfires, drinking beer or roasting marshmallows, are some of my favorite memories ever. I think we're all trying to recreate those memories within our wedding weekends.

Camping on site is also safer and more convenient: since no driving is needed, everyone can party down without worrying about a designated driver. When the party's over - or when you've had enough - you just wander off to your tent and fall asleep. No need to wait until your partner or date is done partying, if they have more staying power than you do. This is a great option for parents: one parent can put the kid(s) to bed, while the other can easily drop in to check on them, or trade-off watching them.

This past weekend in the Tetons revealed one of the drawbacks of camping: you're at the mercy of the weather. Which was freezing! With torrential rain, wind, and pea-sized hail! While we knew it would be cold at night, no one expected the day time temperatures to get stuck in the mid-50s. We'd all brought cute little sundresses and pashminas, which sadly ended up buried under layers of fleece and down.

Which brings me to the other challenge of camping out at a wedding: getting ready. It's tricky to get dolled up in a tent. Mr. Barefoot wisely insisted on getting a hotel room for the night before the wedding, so that we could at least shower before the festivities. To escape the freezing, rainy weather, a couple of our friends ended up bunking with us, and we all elected to get a hotel room for the night of the wedding, rather than camp out in the cold. Had the weather been more cooperative, we would have been thrilled to wake up with the sun and a view of the river, but as it was, we were happy to have a roof over our heads.

The weddings I attended five or ten years ago were all about getting fancy in the city - elegant hotel rooms, cocktails at the bar, receptions in fancy ballrooms or country clubs. I like this new trend of more casual, rustic, low impact events -- and I definitely appreciate the inexpensive accommodations... all I need is the backcountry makeup mirror, and a battery-powered hairdryer.

Having you camped out at a wedding? What are your thoughts, pro or con?

I win!

How cute is that???

It's "Cow" by Ina of WalkingToJericho, and - holy cow! - I won it, thanks to the generosity of stationery designer Avis, at Avie Designs. Lucky me! It pretty much made my day to read that I'd won!

It was hard to decide which of WalkingToJericho's designs I liked best...

This would've been a great gift for my friend A.

Such a peaceful feeling to this one.

But Cow won my heart, with those big brown eyes, and will look perfect in my kitchen.

I'm so pleased to have found Avie Designs, after seeing Avis's wedding featured on A Practical Wedding. The wedding fiesta, with a sombrero cake, looked like such a blast, and I loved what she said about it: "the best week of my life." I wandered over to Avis's blog, and found that her stationery shop has Avie Designs, has tons of gorgeous stuff, much of it on 100% recycled paper, printed with soy inks!


Just the calling card for a barefoot website, no?


Love the pop of the yellow envelope with these 100% recycled invitations.


Yummy... I really need to write more letters. I'd be so excited to see this show up in the mail!

Divine details

Did you see the darling summer-camp-inspired wedding at Style Me Pretty?
You must take a look! It's both gorgeous and laid back.

If the devil - or the divine - is in the details (which is it, really?), they had one helluva - or one heavenly - wedding.

Either way, I pretty much want to steal all their special little touches.

Mr. Barefoot is the world's leading expert on a particular of species of dragonfly found in one Rhode Island swamp. The icon made it onto our registry dishes - so we'll need some dragonflies at the reception as well.



This is exactly the sort of outdoorsy bout I've been dreaming of...



And the tables look so inviting, yet not overdone.



Another inspiring table saved long ago, from - ack! - and unknown source. I'll gladly post the link if someone knows.

More ways to cut costs

Studio Blue photography is offering 20% off packages booked now, starting at $992 for six hours of coverage.

Ajalon Printing and Design, which I discovered via elefantitas alegras, has an *amazing* letterpress special:

100 invitations, enclosure cards, and envelopes for $398!

What a deal!

Quick: they've got to be ordered by June 30, 2009.

If our invitations were not already well under way, I'd totally be going for something like this:


Or this


More reasons to love it: They're based in Sonoma County, the heart of California wine country, where they print on 100% recycled cotton paper (tree-free) and use soy-based inks.



Green and gorgeous.

Notes from the field: ceremony in a redwood grove

As you may recall from a week ago, I was privileged to attend an amazingly fun wedding in the Santa Cruz mountains, completed with bocce, Buddhist prayer flags, and a bonfire. I'm back with some pictures... clearly, I won't be competing with the pros anytime soon, but these give you a feeling for the loveliness of the site.

The ceremony took place in a redwood grove - such a perfectly peaceful setting. I'm a little envious. We considered holding our ceremony at a redwood grove, but the designated sites at Muir Woods, where we hiked the day we got engaged, accommodate only 30 people. (But - wow! - what a glorious site!)

In any case, the redwood grove at Pema Ose Ling was lovely, decorated with flowers and colorful paper lanterns.


A harpist provided the processional and recessional.

An effervescent minister, who clearly knew the couple very well, led the ceremony. Two of my favorite moments were the passing of the rings throughout the assembled friends and family, so that each person in attendance could bless them, and the Blessing in Seven Parts, offered by the parents of the bride and groom.

And the bubbles! Perfectly ethereal!



(and, PS - Data Monkey and Mountain Man: I'm definitely looking forward to your annual vow renewal/ wedding redux parties!!! That was too much fun to do just once!)

A scouting expedition

As a graduate student who does ethnographic research, I know the importance of getting out into the field to observe how particular settings influence people and behaviors.

This weekend, we're going to attend our first ethnographic field study - ah, I mean wedding celebration - since we've been engaged. We went to a wedding back in November, right before we got engaged. I wonder if Mr. Barefoot was scoping out the details back then, before I knew what was coming.... I suspect that being in the midst of planning a wedding changes how one observes everything.

The location sounds amazing - a redwood grove three hours south of San Francisco, at a Buddhist retreat center. There will be croquet and bocce, camping, feasting and dancing under the stars! I can't wait!

To cement your vows...

Concrete rings.

From designboom.

Veggie love

From here, via FFFFOUND!

Having been a vegetarian for more than twenty years - and having convinced my family to stop eating veal when I was just seven years old - I never considered serving meat at my wedding. We don't serve meat at dinner parties, so why would we at the Dinner Party of the Year? I don't want to go to a party where I can't eat the food (though people keep warning me that I won't have a chance to eat at the wedding. This one gets cranky without food, so I will have to find time to eat).

Earth Friendly Weddings takes up the issue of vegetarian weddings today, asking "Can a Vegetarian Meal Ruin a Wedding?", with a comment from Yours Truly. My take on it: Serve what you'd like to eat, thoughtfully prepared for your guests.

I do enjoy fish (yep, not a perfect vegetarian, and believe me, I've been taken to task for this many times over the years. Why vegetarians are expected to by completely consistent paragons of virtue is beyond me...), so we may serve some seasonally, sustainably caught fish. Or not.

Our caterer does amazing things with vegetarian food - I'm pretty sure that everyone will be so busy enjoying the food that they won't pause to wonder where the chicken or steak is.

Beyond the amazing flavors and textures of vegetarian food, it also costs less. The per-head cost our caterer quoted for an all vegetarian meal (no fish) was significantly lower than her lowest per-head cost for a chicken meal. We will be able to offer more dishes for the same price per head, if we don't serve meat. The dinner will actually end up looking more lush and magnificent, with a greater number of choices!

Serving locally-sourced vegetarian food helps reduce the carbon footprint and environmental impact of the wedding. To take just one example, three times as many fossil fuels are required to produce a meat-based diet, as compared with a plant-based diet. (more info here).

For vegetarian cooking at home, I love:

• Fields of Greens, Anne Somervill.
• Vegetarian Cooking for Everyone, Deborah Madison.
• The Moosewood Cookbook, Mollie Katzen.

Our weekly CSA box from Farm Fresh to You includes a batch of recipes for using seasonal vegetables, too.

From here, via FFFFOUND!

Well, I guess that settles it

that's our site!

Mercurio Brothers, the wizards of affordable letterpress, are right here in Berkeley!

I could probably even pick up my order (on my bike!) to save on shipping. When you think about it, that's really more sustainable than ordering invitations from NY that have to be shipped all the way across the country, even if that press is powered by wind from Native Energy.

Mom and Stepdad agree that letterpress is the way to go (having apparently read Miss Manners - as Bride in Exile did - and learned that the only proper way to issue a formal invitation is via a handwritten note or an engraved invitation*), and kicked down some funds to support it (yay!). Next step is figuring out the proper wording to reflect the participation of all the sponsors of this party.

* according to pg. 390-1 of Miss Manners' Guide to Excruciatingly Correct Behavior:

"In a perfect world, people would handwrite all of their formal invitations. But as we live in a world in which people wish to marry before of hundreds of their closest friends, and they claim to have more urgent tasks than copying out hundreds of invitations in their own dear handwriting, we substitute engraving.... The world is full of nasty people who examine backs of wedding invitations and run fingernails over the front in order to tell whether the thing was properly engraved. Miss Manners is one of them. Handwriting and engraving are equally correct; fake engraving and computer generated fonts are imposters."

Letterpress to Save the Planet!

How did I miss this before? Bella Figura creates beautiful letterpress invitations using soy-based and low VOC inks using 100% cotton paper made from reclaimed fibers in a wind powered plant, where employees are given bus passes and memberships in a community-supported agriculture (CSA) farm!

Through participation in 1% for the Planet, an initiative started by reknowned climber and environmentalist Yvon Chouinard of Patagonia sportswear fame, they donate at least 1% of their annual revenues to environmental organizations worldwide. They have really raised the bar for environmentally-responsible invitations. How incredibly cool that they are marrying their passion for paper and design with their commitment to protect the environment - something Mr. Barefoot and I want to emulate. I love it when people pursue what they love, while keeping the larger social and environmental perspectives in mind.

And their designs are absolutely beautiful!



A small additional bonus is that they're based in Syracuse, NY, where my late, and much-beloved, grandmother lived for every single one of her 98 years. When I got engaged, she was the first one I wanted to tell, but alas, I had to waft a message upward and hope that it reached her, rather than picking up the phone. I wish so much that she could be at my wedding. Getting something from her hometown might make me feel like she was included.